examine yourself

"Are you a Christian? Many people who claim to be point to some event in the past to substantiate their claim. But inviting Jesus to come into your life in the past is not proof that you are genuinely saved. In 2 Corinthians 13:5 Paul says to the Corinthian church, "Examine yourselves, whether you are in the faith; prove yourselves (emphasis added)." He wouldn't have said that if some event in the past were obviously the answer. The Bible never verifies anyone's salvation by the past but by the present. If there is no evidence of salvation in your life now, you need to face the fact that you may not be a Christian. You need to examine yourself to see whether you are in the faith. How does one do that? Jesus shows us in the Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5‑7). "

this was written by john macarthur over at grace to you. i definetly needed to read this. i've been doing alot of self-examination lately, pretty much daily and this puts alot of things into perspective. read the rest here.

i think i'm gonna use this as a reference, survey, and reminder. man this walk is hard, but i do like that at one point macarthur says;

"No man has the resources within himself to live up to God's standards. That's
why we have to cast ourselves on the mercy of God. The rich young ruler in
Matthew 19 wasn't willing to do that. He wanted to enter the Kingdom but on his
terms. However, that's like trying to put a camel through the eye of a needle.
The only way into the Kingdom is by becoming broken in spirit, mournful, and
eager for a righteousness that you can't attain and don't deserve."

now if i can just get that through my head. i think i keep relying on my own strength. ha...what strength?? my motives too, gotta check those. need to refocus and make sure that motives are for God, to bring pleasure to Him. pray for me fam, cuz i know God has plans for me and i'm searching them out. but i'm also not giving myself to Him fully, not praying like i should be and sincerely seeking my purpose in Him. pray that He gives me His strength and that i truely seek Him and live according to His will for me.