theology and doctrine hmmm

i've been a believer for quite some time, since i was a young child. but it wasn't until recently that i became aware of theology and doctrine. i mean i've heard those words before, but that's all they were. well not really, i knew they meant something but wasn't sure exactly what and i didn't know their importance. well thanks mostly to alot of the reading i do at holycultureradio.com forum, i'm starting to do some investigating. it's mostly due to alot of the debates that have been going on at the message board, mostly around Calvinism and Arminianism. more of that kinda talk is done at the general theology board. right nowthis one in particular is pretty good and people are talking without throwing insults around. it's a much better read then some of the previous threads. now when it comes to which group i may fall under, i wouldn't say that i am one or the other, but if it came down to it, i'd probably be considered Arminian. some of the discussions that go on at the site, i've had with other friends to some degree, but nothing like these guys. there's alot of talk about church history and stuff i've just never heard of. but just like the discussions i've had with the guys, it's caused me to dig deeper, which is good, cuz i need to spend more time in the Word and in prayer. the good thing about not being involved in the dicusssions on the board for me is that i don't go into the Word with the mindset that i'm gonna prove someone else wrong. i am earnestly seeking though, to see if what this or that person says lines up with Scripture. i'm also just trying to get know God better. it's sooo much though man, all the doctrinal beliefs, alot of heady stuff, lots of terms to learn and some of the writers (writers of doctrine) were from different time periods so i have to get through their different way of speaking or writing as it were. hopefully this lasts for me, cuz i can get really into something then either just drop it or slowly fade out of it. but the desire is there now and it really stems from a desire to know God and to be the man He intends me to be. but it's time to go, gotta train to catch!!