transformation

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation, the old has gone, the new has come!" - II Corinthians 5:17


man i wanna feel like that!! at times i do, i mean my way of thinking has changed in some aspects. the way i look at people, alot of my selfishness has taken a big step back. i realize how selfish i can be so that's big. i look at my motivation for doing things before i do them. so i guess the change is coming along. but i guess sometimes i want more. i guess i just want to be "super christian". full of biblical knowledge, Holy Spirit filled, always saying and thinking the right things. perfect i guess. and that's not possible while i'm here.





"Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." - Romans 12:2

i'm realizing that this is easier to do when you're surrounded by a community of believers. "Just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we who are many form one body, and each member belongs to all the others." Romans 12:4-6. each of the parts of the body can function on their own, but work better when they work together. so we need each other. for encouragment, to pray for each other, to keep each other in line. i'd like to find that kinda community. it could help with the transformation process and i think thats how God intended for things to work among us while we are growing in Him.

weakness

psalm 51:10 "Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me."

that's my prayer. i should probably say it everyday. i was talking to a friend the other day and its been my thought at times that i'd like to feel close to God all the time like the songs you hear from artists talking about their relationship with God and authors of books suggesting ways to have a closer relationship with Him. sometimes i wonder if its possible that people really have that all the time and that it's always "all good" with them and the Lord. its frustrating to me that i struggle with walking down the narrow road. sometimes (too many times) i go off course and it takes me awhile to get back on track. although these days i've been really missing my quiet time with God and the effect He has on me. He really does change how you think and view the world. alot of those changes are still there, i guess i just struggle with my own weaknesses and don't like that they're so hard for me to put down. "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." hopefully like paul someday i'll "delight in weaknesses" and know that "when I am weak, then I am strong."

let's build part deux

so i called the bro that i sent the email to. the convo went well. i basically let him know that i think that as brothers we should building each other up. i told him we should be supporting each other and that the tone of the emails were changing. i told him that i thought him and the other bro were at times saying the same thing and that sometimes emails were not the best way to have that kinda discussion after it gets to a certain level. i also asked him if he saw that kinda discussion as fruitful. will it help a brother in his growth? help him to be a better father, husband, or help him live his life according to how God wants us to live our lives. i said that i was saying it as an observer and one who was wondering if that kind of going back and forth is beneficial. he took it well and we talked about some other things. he kinda started preaching and i told him that he's preachin to the choir. my parents had us have family devotions at nite when i was very young. My mom witnessed to my brother, she was a witness to me just by how she lived and conducted herself. my dad would tell us to read our bible often. i let him know there was plenty of bible in my life before meeting him. and i didn't even mention that i was a bible quizzer for 4yrs. not that that makes me a scholar in any way but he wouldn't be saying anything i haven't heard before meeting him, lol. so over all it went well and hopefully i left him with some things to think about.

let's build

the guys were at it again...

i mentioned some guys that i know who have an email group where God/the bible is discussed. its become more and more obvious that there are some varying beliefs among these brothers. anyway the topic of the Godhead has been the most recent thing they've discussed and it's been mostly between two brothers but the whole email group was included on the emails. well it started to get a little heated cuz they were not in agreement on each other's view. the emails were paragraphs long and it was alot of going back and forth. now one of the brothers made the mistake of calling me and others out. he basically said that he was surprised he didn't hear any input from me to refute something that the other brother said and that i "knew better". wrong move dude. i've never even discussed the subject with him so he doesn't know where i stand. i sent a response, but i didn't even touch the subject, here is what i sent:



greetings brothers,
#####,

i chose not to get involved in this discussion because i'd rather have
fellowship. i'd prefer not to debate. i'm seeing more and more debate and disagreement than fellowship. and like john said its somewhat troubling. i still don't feel like that is what the Word was given to us for. these are some very
lengthy emails and they seem to be going in circles. at times it seems more like
this is turning into "i'm going to prove i'm right". let me ask you some
questions. if two brothers disagree on their view of scripture does that mean
one's saved and the other isn't? does that mean that one loves the Lord and
the other doesn't? does that mean that one's interpretation is right and the
other's interpretation is wrong?? who among us can judge???

this is what i believe: i believe we should pray for each other. i believe
we should pray that our hearts are opened to His Word and to Him and that He
continues to work in each other lives and that He reveals His truth to us.

I Corinthian 13 8-12

8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where
there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass
away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection
comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I
thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put
childish ways behind me. 12Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then
we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully,
even as I am fully known.

i've talked to one of the guys who was in this debate since sending the response and let him know that i'm thinking about asking to be removed from the email list. i wanna be a part of something where we're building each other up, not where people are puffing themselves up cuz of their biblical knowledge and/or debating about their interpretation of scripture and humility is lacking. i will be calling the other brother today since i see that he's tried to call me once. i was on the cape so i didn't get the call. hopefully he doesn't take what i sent as a personal attack on him or as an endorsement of the other brother. but for one, he shouldn't have called me out and secondly when you do something like that you should be careful about the words you use. can't we all just get along??

its tough enough to be a Godly man and to stay on the narrow road. and as a body of believers we should be lifting each other up and supporting each other thru the struggle.
i've got some chores to do. i'll give the brother a call and post on how the convo went later.

vacation - kind of a rant

well vacation isn't turning out how i would've hoped. didn't have big hopes but...here we go. this weekend was our 12 yr anniversary and we went to the cape. the wife's tooth has been bugging her and got much worse this weekend. jr is teething and realized he wasn't home and didn't want to go to sleep until after eleven. i woke up to find wifey rocking and crying from the pain at about three in the morning on monday and it didn't get better by tuesday. the time on the cape was cool but she was in pain and jr was off his schedule. we left the cape earlier than planned and she had her tooth pulled that afternoon. i didn't end up working out, which i was looking forward to but i didn't feel much like it after taking her to her appt, going home and taking care of lil' man then going back and picking her up after the appt. yesterday i ended up playing playstation for hours and didn't go to the gym. didn't feel much like it, mostly cuz i was zoning from the playstation and it was late and i didn't sleep much the nite before, probably from playing playstion till about five a.m wednesday morning.

i played ball this morning but my back was incredibly stiff from playing playstation all day in the same position. not enjoyable. i worked out today but wifey has a big test next tuesday and had to go to a friend's to study this morning, i was with cranky pants who was quite cranky. i went to the gym but felt under the gun cuz the wifey had a second study group at eight o'clock and i didn't get to the gym till after seven. she knew i wouldn't be home until after eight. and it's thursday already!! tomorrow i have jr from one till nine. doesn't sound like much of a vacation. don't get me wrong. i love being with my son, no doubt, but it doesn't quite fall into vacation mode when he's cranky. the things i was looking forward to the most were the anniversary weekend and playing ball and working out. none of those things went to well. i think i needed a two week vacation. oh well. its a vacation from work. and it's definetly good to not have to be at work. life still happens, can't take a vacation from that. on the bright side, i did get some quiet time this morning. just left the tv volume turned all the way down, played some playstation (again) while wifey and lil' man slept. i realized how much quiet time i don't get. always some noise going on. i hope to be able to take an hour of quiet time a day or about three times a day. gonna try and go somewhere quiet during lunch. ok, i'm rambling...goin' to bed.

New Look

i was ready for a change and put up a new template. wish i could say i created it but i like it alot. maybe some day i'll have the time to sit down and create my own. well...it'll definetly take more than one day that's for sure. but i'm learning css (casscading style sheets)...slowly, but i'm learning. the syntax is what i struggle with the most right now. and like anything else it takes practice practice practice. i'm on vacation this coming week!! horrayy!! maybe i'll put some time in during the week on learning some more

funny

i don't really have a comment, just that this made me chuckle...hehe

the battle rages on!!

i think i need a refresher on "every man's battle". maaahn!! my job is surrounded by colleges. two are all girls colleges. there are about three other colleges in the area also, along with fenway stadium and a few bars, clubs, restaurants, gyms, etc. so the amount of women of all ages is overwhelming to say the least. and not to use the common excuse but the clothes they wear doesn't help. like man ambassador says;


Most women have care in their genes
Where’s the care you killin' us today the way you're wearing those jeans
A few of us really care for the king
We’ve got to fight when you're in sight
For other men staring's no thing
Well don't look then
Well sis, I wasn't lookin'
But if I’ve gotta nose can I help smellin' the cookin'
I know you can blame it on the weakness of men
But the weakness is made weaker when we see your skin


so this brutha is strugglin again. one of the methods "every man's battle" suggests is to "bounce" your eyes, but i get dizzy from all the bouncing lol. cuz my eyes bounce from one girl and end up in another one's direction!! its tough cuz i take the T so they're everywhere. another thing is the IT dept works in the basement of our building and there are no windows so you don't even know if the sun is out. plus they've had issues with mold in the basement so its good to go out and get fresh air. but going outside is dangerous lol. and when there's a home game...forgetaboutit!!

i'm being humorous about it but it is something i've noticed of course. and i can't express enough how tough it is to be surrounded by people who have no respect for God. i can't keep count of the amount of times someone says "jesus christ", or "jee-zus" or "oh christ". since when did it become so fashionable to use His name as a curse word?? i cringe everytime i hear it. some even say "cheese and rice!" cuz it sounds close to it. arrggh. i miss fellowshiping with people who have a love for God. people who wanna live for God, wanna be closer to Him. I MISS HAVING MY QUIET TIME!! .


i know a few guys who communicate via email but more often than anything it turns into some sort of debate on how one interperts this or that scripture or doctrine. and the emails get to be paragraphs long and the threads can go on for days. for example today an email was sent asking a question about women's role in the church and what paul said concerning that topic. he asked the ques cuz there was a judge and prophet named deborah in the book of Judges who had a postion of leadership. now the guy directed the question to another brother who responded by saying that he'd address his questions under the conditions of his sencerity to know the truth! and went on to say he was more concerned about the question asker's belief on who Jesus Christ is. in another email thread there was discussion about the Trinity and there was disagreement. i can't even beging to go into that right now. but it just wasn't a cool way to respond and i'm tired of these guys debating. its not fellowship.

but....i have a train to catch. so i'm out. maybe i'll post more on that subject later. peace out!!

Cool!!

Partial beard, freestyle : German Willi Chevalier, contestant in the category partial beard, freestyle, poses in Berlin, during the World Beard and Moustache Championships. (AFP/DDP/Marcus Brandt)

meant to live

Fumbling his confidence
And wondering why the world has passed him by
Hoping that he's bent for more than arguments,
And failed attempts to fly, fly

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

Dreaming about Providence
And whether mice or men have second tries
Maybe we've been livin with our eyes half open
Maybe we're bent and broken, broken

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much mor
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside


Lyrics by Switchfoot