the purpose of the Crucifixion?

it's always interesting and sometimes confusing to find out what others believe. especially other "christians" or "believers", i only use the quotes because we say we believe in the same Christ or the same things about Christ. as for the quotes around christians, many many people call themselves christians even tho they don't believe that Christ is the Son of God. anyway, i've been surfing and come across blogs of people that believe that Christ died for all and thus all have been saved. (at least thats what i think i'm getting from them) and that God being loving and merciful would not condemn people to be eternally seperated from Him since Christ died on the cross for all. how does that explain Jesus saying "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." -John 14:6. would God send His son to die for a world that doesn't believe in His son? how does that reconcile man to God if he still doesn't believe and accept the gift of His son? as i understand it, Christ is the bridge for man to God, He's our intercessor.
how does that way of thinking of the work of the cross work with what Jesus said -

"Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the desert, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, that everyone who believes in him may have eternal life."

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son." - John 3:14-18

now i've seen where just verse 17 is quoted, but verse 18 is left out. what about what John says at the end of chapter 3 regarding Jesus when someone came to him because Jesus was baptizing people?

"The Father loves the Son and has placed everything in his hands. Whoever believes in the Son has eternal life, but whoever rejects the Son will not see life, for God's wrath remains on him." - John 3:35-36

I've also seen arguments that this would go against the nature of a loving God. God is Holy and yes He loves us, but He loves us enough to give us a choice to choose Him or not. isn't that one of the aspects of love? i have a son, who is still very dependent on me (5 1/2 months). at some point he will grow up and do what he wants. to me, to love him, is to allow him to persue his interests. now i can guide him and tell him what i think is best, but that's it. i shouldn't try to force him to live the life i think he should live. if i try to force him to do things my way then how is that love and how is that me listening to him and allowing him to be who he thinks he is? now he may choose to do something that i'm totally against, but that doesn't mean that i love him any less. i will still love him no matter what and hope that some day he chooses to do something different with his life. in the same way, i think that's how God loves us. He gave us our own minds to make decisions. His desire is that we choose His way. He knows better, He knows whats best for us, after all He created us.

For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

- psalm 139:13-16

But we still have a choice, "free will". God is all knowing and all powerful, doesn't it seem like He'd find another way to save all mankind without sacrficing His only son? i dunno, i just think we need to be careful about what we do with the purpose of the cross and why Christ came. God is a loving God, and He is also a Holy God and we cannot forget that part. His nature is Holy and He shows that by the flood, the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah and the fact that a price had to be paid for sin. IMO, The mercy and grace of God is shown in the sending of his son to pay that price.

btw, i am in no way judging what someone else believes, just explaining why i believe what i do.